“Do you wish there was more to life than just this?” Sungjong swung briskly on the swing under the clear night sky, peeking at the stars above the both of your heads. ”More to life than what?” You saw some stars twinkle in the sky. ”Being people. Having a life, living, that kind of thing,” Sungjong continued to swing. You turned your sight to face him and he did the same.
“There’s always love,” you responded.
“Love is what you feel for family and friends. I don’t believe in relationship love,” Sungjong frowned his own saying. He wished he knew what it was. Love. To love, to be in love, to fall in love…
“Love is out there for you, Sungjong. You just have to be patient!” you smiled and grabbed his hand, swinging hand in hand with him. He gave you a smile back and nodded, wishing he could believe in your words of advice.
The seven men clinked their glasses together a couple of years later, standing around the restaurant table, congratulating themselves on their latest achievement. ”Cheers!” they all roared in unison and drank their cups. Suddenly, a phone rung loudly.
“Turn it off! It’s our time to hang out and chill~” Sungyeol said, being already slightly drunk. Sungjong heard it coming from his jeans and when he was about to turn it off, he noticed it was from your parents. He went to the corner of the restaurant, away from the noisy boys.
Your mom was crying and Sungjong couldn’t understand a word she was saying. Your dad took over the phone and told him to come to where they were. Sungjong slowly turned off his phone, in shock at where you were. ”I have to go,” Sungjong grabbed his coat off his chair. The boys were asking questions as to where he was going, but he didn’t reply. His heart was pounding in anxiety. He left without another word.
Running into the emergency room where everyone waited, he caught your parents eyes. Your mom was huddled in your dad’s arms, still crying. Your dad looked up at Sungjong and explained the story quietly. The more and more he told, the more Sungjong couldn’t handle it. His eyes were glooming, trying his best to hold in the tears. The doctor came and brought them to the room you were in.
There, you lied peacefully on your bed, connected to many machines. Your heart rate was steady, but slow compared to the normal person. Your eyes flickered and opened just enough to recognize who was in the room with you.
“Hi, guys,” you smiled as you wheezed into your air mask. Your mom came up to you, brushing your hair with the tips of her fingers. Her eyes were surrounded by the redness of her extensive tears. “It’s going to be okay,” your mom whimpered out and she started to cry again. ”I know, mom,” you panted. Your lungs were on fire and breathing was the hardest thing at that moment.
The collision between you and the truck was no match for your puny car. It was a green light for you, but the driver ran his red light. The driver thought he could make it. It was foggy and pitch black, making you not able to see anything on the road. Everything went by in a second and you woke up, bordered by lights and doctors.
Your dad held your right hand. “We love you very much, sweetie,” You could tell he was trying his best to stay strong, but behind those wrinkles and wise eyes, there was struggling pain. Sungjong stood at the edge of the bed, right by your feet.
“Hey, you,” You tried your best to smile under the mask at him. Sungjong, just like your dad, had the same look in his eyes. “Don’t speak, save your breath,” he ordered gently. Sungjong could only give you so much of a smile, but he was breaking on the inside. He saw from underneath your thin gown that you were still bleeding.
The doctor called the three of them over by the door and you could tell you weren’t going to make it. Besides how your body felt, your mom bawled out onto your dad’s shoulder and Sungjong turned his head to the floor. Your parents came by your bed after they were done speaking to the doctor, giving their last messages of love and false hope for you. You would’ve cried if you could, but your body didn’t even have enough energy for that. Your dad patted Sungjong on the back before he and your mom left the room, leaving the two of you alone. He sat next to you on your bed.
“I guess this is good-bye, huh?” you coughed at the end of your sentence and tried to breathe, fighting to live these possible last few moments with Sungjong. He shook his head, grabbing one of your hands and stroking your face with the other.
“Nothing’s over,” Sungjong whispered. Giggling with what energy you have, you couldn’t believe at a time like this he’d still make you feel good. Suddenly, Sungjong kissed you over your air mask, where your lips would’ve touched his. Your weak eyes widened just a bit, surprised at what he did.
His eyes started to water as he asked, “Did you know that I love you?” You nodded. He shook his head with closed eyes, tears starting to roll down his soft cheeks. “I mean, as more than a friend…” Your eyes were simply watching him, confessing his feelings. You wanted to say something, but you couldn’t even think. Your body was near the end. You couldn’t do anything. You couldn’t feel him or hold him any longer. Sungjong felt your hand losing grip. He knew there wasn’t much time left.
“You were right, that night we were at the playground,” Sungjong was rushing his words through his tears, trying to make sure you could hear it all. “I waited, day and night for that one person you said to be patient for. But I didn’t realize that the person I loved from the start was…” You felt like you were about to faint, but you knew what it was. This was the end of everything. That oxygen would no longer be able to save you. You couldn’t fight for your life any longer. You gasped and with the last breath, you hung onto Sungjong’s hand.
“…you.”
The flatline echoed the room. Sungjong kissed your forehead. The doctors came in and pulled him away from your lifeless body. Sungjong stayed at the doorway. Your parents were behind him and witnessed the doctors trying to make you live once again with defibrillators, but it didn’t work. Your parents, even your father, were crying now. Sungjong told them to call him if they needed him for anything and he left the hospital.
Night time at the dorm was horrible for Sungjong. Everyone wondered why he was crying all night. Everyone woke up, trying to get it out of him. He couldn’t believe you died, right in front of his own eyes.
“Sungjong, I don’t know where you were or what happened, but we have schedules tomorrow, so try to get some sleep, okay?” Sunggyu patted the back of Sungjong’s head that was crying into his pillow. Hoya and Dongwoo tried to go back to sleep in their bunks beside Sungjong’s, tolerating his despair and the others went to their own beds, worrying about their maknae. Eventually, Sungjong went to sleep that night and dreamt of you. The two of you were swinging on the same swings under the same night sky that evening you two were talking about two years before.
“You just have to be patient!” You chirped, still holding his hand. He let go of your hand and cupped your face for a shocking kiss. You weren’t sure what was going on, but you kissed him back. “I love you,” he squeaked next to your face.
“I love you too…” You gave him the biggest smile and the dream continued on with you two swinging hand in hand, talking about all the good things in each other’s life.
This was where Sungjong wanted to stay, but he knew this was only going to be in his dreams now. Dreams in where you continued to live, just the two of you being in love with each other.
“Sungjong! We have a vistor!~” Woohyun sang in the dorm.
Sungjong ran out of the bathroom with an apron and yellow gloves on, you assumed Sunggyu and the boys were making him clean the bathroom. You stood there smiling with your backpack on.
“What are you doing here?’ Sungjong curiously asked, excited from your presence.
“My boss let me off early and I wanted to stop by to say hi,”
“Dinner’s here!” Sungyeol roared, running to the managers coming through the door. The managers gave the bags to Sungyeol and Sungyeol placed them onto the marble floors of the living room. The boys got down on their knees to unpack the food.
“You should stay for dinner!” Sungjong squealed.
“Oh, I don’t know… I don’t want to intrude…”
“Nonsense! As long as L doesn’t inhale everything we ordered, I’m sure we’ll be fine!” Sunggyu said as Myungsoo glared at his hyung.
“Okay, I guess I can stay for dinner,” You held the straps of your backpack between your fingers and sat down with the boys.
“I’ll be out in one minute! I’m almost done cleaning!” Sungjong ran back into the bathroom.
As the boys continued to unpack the food, you put your backpack down extremely carefully down to the floor. The boys huddled in closer to you.
“Do you guys have the bowl?” you whispered almost inaudibly.
“Yeah, it’s in the kitchen. Go, go, go!” Sungyeol pushed you. You slid on your socks into the kitchen, seeing Sungjong’s old fishbowl. You ran back into the living room to open your backpack, pulling out the transparent water filled bag that had a blue fish in it. The boys gave you a thumbs up and you went back into the kitchen again to put the fish into the bowl. You thew the rubber band into the garbage can and softly tilted the open bag into the bowl, letting the water and fish flow into the bowl without a drop on the counter. You recalled the day Sungjong’s fish died and he had a bit of a hard time dealing with it. You remember the day he flushed it down the toilet. He cried while you held his hand in comfort. You weren’t sure how he’ll react to the newly bought fish since the last fish he bought was special in Sungjong’s heart. Brushing your hands in success, you left the fish in his bowl to get back into the living room. You saw the boys finished unpacking all the food and started to dig in. Sungjong came out of the bathroom without his apron nor gloves, just in time for dinner.
“Ah, we have a guest! I’ll get plates,” Sungjong started to walk towards the kitchen and everyone shouted in unison, “No!”
Sungjong stared at all of you as if you were crazy. “What’s wrong with the kitchen?”
“Leaking,” Woohyun mumbled with his mouth full of meat.
“If there’s leaking, then shouldn’t someone clean it…?” He continued to walk into the kitchen and screamed in a high pitch. Crap… You were now regretting that you bought a fish for him. To replace something so precious to Sungjong was a stupid move. You ran to the kitchen after him and saw him holding the fishbowl close to his face. Your jaw dropped from the sight.
“Why are you in my kitchen?” Sungjong talked cutely to the fish through the fishbowl. You begun to giggle and Sungjong gave his attention to you.
“Did you buy this for me?” The fishbowl was put down softly and he shuffled his feet to position himself right in front of you.
“Yeah… But I wasn’t sure if you wanted one or not!”
Sungjong squeezed you tight and whispered a thank you in your ear. You hugged him back and pulled him back to the living room for dinner.
“Wait! Let me bring the fish!” Sungjong ran to the fishbowl and held it tightly in his arms while holding your hand casually.
Requested by: thetruthaboutmyforever
***
“Do you like fish?” you whispered in the dark.
Sungjong held your hand while the two of you were on the top bunk under his bedsheets. All the boys were out clubbing on their day off. Sungjong decided to use his day off to spend it with you. The two of you were just asking each other questions to pass the time until one of you fell asleep.
“I love fish!” he squealed making you giggle. You couldn’t see perfectly in the pitch darkness, but you saw the outline of his face which was right in front of yours. Both of you were leaning on the side of one of your arms.
“Do you ever get tired of being an idol?”
All you heard was Sungjong’s breathing, but you knew he was concentrating on an answer to give you. Your mind had a flashback of the last time you hung out with Sungjong. 2 months ago. You were at an arcade with him, having the time of your life. You remember laughing at him losing lots of the games and after losing, he’d jump on the floor in irritation while he made cute sounds of distress. The two of you ended off the night eating an ice cream sundae together.
Fast forward to now, the only time you could only ever see him in real life was during his recordings or live performances. On top of that, you couldn’t catch every thing Infinite did, since you did have a life of your own. It killed you on the inside that the only time you ever communicated with him was through technology.
Sungjong bit his lip, still thinking on how to reply. His first thought was a definite yes, but he started to think of the days before debut. His sweat and hardwork - how much he wanted to be an idol. Now that he was a rising idol, he barely slept (or some nights were sleepless ones) and schedules were busier than ever. On top of that, you couldn’t be around as much as he wanted you to be because of his lifestyle.
“A little bit,” he replied heavyheartedly. Your free hand swept the side of his cheek, embracing how amazing and fragile his skin was. The gesture to show him that he shouldn’t regret being an idol, that you were okay with the way his life was being lived. It was Sungjong’s turn to ask you a question.
“Do you love me?” Sungjong’s voice cracked at the end of question. You two have exchanged the phrase once or twice, but never really talked about it seriously. Rather than answering him first, your hands cupped his cheeks and your lips grazed over his, hoping your actions would be worth more than words.
“Of course I love you, Lee Sungjong,” You rubbed the tip of your nose against his and you could hear him giggle through the kisses the two of you shared right after.
If he asked you an amusing question, you felt it was your turn to ask one too. “Do you find me pretty?”
Sungjong gasped so loud, you thought something happened to him under the sheets. “What?! Are you okay?”
“Yeah, I’m okay. Just shocked that you would ever ask me that! You are so beautiful…”
Beautiful. The word made you flutter. Sungjong grabbed you into his arms, cuddling you tightly. The two of you went back to asking questions. As the night went on, he started to yawn and asked if you were awake still. You didn’t reply and he begun to hear a soft snore. Sungjong smiled and closed his eyes, hoping his dreams would connect with yours once he fell asleep.